02/27--
MONDAY

   I'm listening to Heavenly Angelic Choir music to counter all the bad I listened to and watched earlier.

  The wind is really gusting outside, blowing very hard, and the rain is pouring down.

My new EBT FS BAL is $179.30-----
I am a shadow of Junk_bow.

My mother had to stay off her feet when she was in labor with me.

  My destiny is irrevocably tied to Maggie's somehow.

Junk_bow is a dream demon.

I broke free and became my own person when I faced my mirror last year.

Yesterday I went into Pastor Pete's church's prayer room and prayed, and God told me one day I'll wake up and I won't be addicted anymore.

Pastor Pete said he hopes that day comes sooner rather than later.

I really fell tonight, before I wrote today.  It is 3:43 AM.

5:31 AM

The reevangelism project.

Each day in my journal, I will spend some time reminding myself of the Great Gospel.

01 Jesus came in the fulness of time to save us from and take away our sins.  He was baptized in Bethabara beyond Jordan to fulfill all righteousness.

02 On this side of the world, Jesus came to MesoAmerica to the Nephites and Lamanites to establish Zionic conditions conditions all over North and Central America.

03 In 1830, after 1260 years of Darkness, God restored His Church and Priesthood to the earth, through his Prophet Joseph Smith, Jr.

04 In 2017 AD the Angel Moroni gave Mauricio Artur Berger the ability to translate the Sealed Book of Mormon by the Gift and Power of God.

05 The Book Sealed of Mormon will be given to the earth when mankind accedes to the instructions given in the Sealed Book of Mormon.

Oh I fell.
Oh I fell before I wrote at 3:40 AM today.  Oh I fell greatly.

I did a lot of damage to my mind.

  I even fantasized about being married to Maggie as I was recovering.  Dear Lord, forgive.

Amen. 

  Rewire Your Heart, pp. 44-45.

       I'm struggling through the book.  I resisted the truth.

  Yesterday I read more of PokemonSoldier's DuckTales17 Fanfics and finished watching Season 2 of DuckTales 2017, and faced my fears.

   Then I tried again to experiment with Lucid dreaming but I learned that it is ineffective without Transcendental Meditation, chakras and Third Eye Opening, and you often have a hard time distinguishing between when you're dreaming and when you're awake and have to do reality checks. Not for me.  I listened to Angelic Choirs singing, Ave Maria and Hymns-lots and lots of Hymns.
      Steve borrowed about a cup of  Almond Milk from me.  His new refridgerator gave out on him and he lost most of his food.  I told him that trials were part and parcel of life and that Believers went through more intense trials than nonbelievers.  He said he knew about that. (or didn't know about that ? ?) (Maybe I misheard him ? ? )
  Last night at around 8 PM CDT Steve and I watched an episode of The Last of Us, the HBO MAX miniseries.
        The first part, I had watched in video game format on YouTube streamed by th3birdman.

Rn I'm watching Th3birdman play The Last of Us Part 2 I thought corresponding to the Last of Us HBO TV Series, Part 2.  No, this is the old game, posted 2 years ago, in 2021.   It is basically the same story.  The new game is the PlayStation 5 reboot.
            Steve is not interested in the game.
    In yesterday's episode of The Last of Us Miniseries, Ellie and her black female friend went to an ancient derelict shopping mall, had fun, danced, kissed, were about to have sex, but were attacked by a zombie and both got infected. In the end of the show, Ellie was stitching a man's wound up.

       In this game I'm watching I saw Ellie cured from that Infecting.  She and the man had to escape the hospital, him carrying her.

      What I'd like to get accomplished today is to make four YouTube Playlists and several Mara/Luke4ever playlists of my SW HV's and Serious Scripts, then type some of my adventure Story about Constance and Eustace, Bruce and Termna, Mant and others.
       Then I want to start a new fictional Diary about Anakin waking up in Ohio after being in the Netherworld of the Force.

  To Whom it may concern- It's going to get better! - Mike McLure, Jr.

  Zeon the Digger is now reading my scripts.

 Joy is using my money to pay the pet deposit for my cat!

Star Wars Santa is listening to Episode 12 rn.

03/02--
THURSDAY

                                   9:12 PM, DAY PREVIOUS
                    Today is my appointment with Tracy, I think (confirmed).

                     Tonight, after I stream Wolfenstein and read Ian's fanfics, I may watch more of MellVerse's playing The Last of Us to correspond to the show.  I am very interested in Ellie's story.

   I decided it was time time to start a new journal tomorrow (today, on Wednesday).  I decided instead of streaming
   more Wolf 3-D tonight I'll prioritize Ian's stories first and I will tell Ian so.

Ian said 'Okay, cool' to that.

                                               10:15 PM, NIGHT PREVIOUS
                            I'm watching the movie 'Corraline' to face my fears and to prepare for reading 'CarroLouie', a DuckTales Fanfic Ian read that he wants me to read.  It popped right up on PlutoTV, On Demand.

                                             10:42 PM CDT, DAY PREVIOUS
                Corraline is pretty freaky so far.  The girl is starting not to be able to distinguish fantasy from reality.

                                              11:52 PM CDT, DAY PREVIOUS

@asymmetricinfo on Twitter gave me pause this evening: What is early-stage Capitalism and pre-Capitalism?
Are they anything like Distributism and/or Zionic Endeavor?
                                               12:34 AM
  Tonight I'm watching Lupin the 3'rd: Part 5+50'th Anniversary Special, which is my first time watching Lupin 3'rd

Lupin the 3'rd is a very good show.

CHCOH: $162.00-----

Jaysin is back.  Fred brought him back here.

Now I will read some more of Ian's fanfics.  It's 2:15 AM CDT

                              3:08 AM CDT
       I read one of Ian's fanfics, and am listening to Glenn Beck.

    Legodude494 says he'll check out my Star Wars Serious Scripts later.

                                         9:07 AM CDT
  I created a RPG discord server called Roleplaying Fun about 38 minutes ago.  so far, I have one Member on it, MortarGodNA.  As far as I can tell, he agrees to play.
                                          9:13 AM CDT
                             I asked some people if they would like to be Moderators on my RPG server.

                                           9:44 AM CDT
                               It will take time and patience.  I created two characters and posted the beginnings of two roleplays to my boards.

                                                 12:50 PM
                                       I went to the bookstore, got some good books, talked to Ian on discord, read one of his stories, ate lunch and talked to MortarGodNA.  He wants me to teach him how to roleplay after my counseling appointment, if he's available before his kickboxing training, because he's going somewhere after that.

                                               CHCOH: $109.00-----

                                                       3:33 PM
                           Now I have 4 Members besides me on my Roleplaying Fun server.

                                  My counseling appointment went great!  We discussed that I have delusions and my need to daily take my meds to combat them.  I showed her my Star Wars Comics, RPG discord server and three websites and flawed Maggie story and let her borrow Rewire Your Heart.  All in all I'd say it was an a-ok appointment.  I took my bicycle there and back. 

03/04--
SATURDAY

                                   1:20 AM CDT
Yesterday,------- after sleeping for a while longer, I got up around 3:30-3:40 PM, wrote more of a fictional post-Apocalyptic speculation journal called hypothetical next day (Brent) (in fictional Diaries section of my diarylogsite website), walked to KC's, bought a coca-cola, came home, wrote more of that story, napped more, got up, continued building my RPG Fun discord server after the advice of Difficulty Tweak (who will read my SW stories now, I think) (Gaming Dude thinks my Scripts have a lot of potential), and rewrote the Rules of it, biked to KC's, bought a Zero Sugar Orange sodapop, ate supper and chatted with Difficulty Tweak and briefly with Ian, then hired Gaming Dude as both a Moderator and GameMaster on my Roleplaying Fun server, then read a friend's Story for a while, then wrote in my Diary.
I also exercised today.
    All-in-all, I had a lot of fun.

                                                                   7:17 AM
               Mike McLure, Jr. Tweeted "Good things are coming. Just keep believing."

 After I read a lot of the Fate (what my RPG Server is based on) basics guidebook, I edited my server, sent a ping to Sheiv The Wise in Santa's Covert, and went to bed for an hour (although it felt like five minutes.) then couldn't sleep, got up and streamed Wolfenstein, beating a very difficult level.

    Then at 7 AM I called Pastor Pete and updated him on my life's progress.

He said I'm getting the things I wanted.

:I'm thankful to God to have these things and I delight in God, the Giver of the gifts.

I'm literally doig eight things right now.

                                         11:05 AM
                I'm listening to the Book of Mormon.  I'm taking another, third, nap now. 
 

03/06--
MONDAY

  I am at Rick's.  It is 12:57 AM CDT.  A train is going by.

   I read Ian's Nightmare on Killmotor Hill today.

     I mentioned how I faced my shadow earlier in my journal, and Shane told me tonight that he faced his shadow too.
     I talked face to face with Shane on discord video chat.  Everything is alright between us, and between him and God.
     Ian is more of an empiricist and a Deist.
Although he regularly writes about the paranormal and the supernatural and strange in stories, he doesn't believe in anything that cannot readily and obviously on the surface be rationally explained.
  Whenever I bring up theoretical physics or Theology to him he gets angry at me and tells me he is getting uncomfortable and to back off. He seems very uncomfortable with any discussion of Hermes the Thrice Great.
Ian thinks if what I'm saying is true, then there is no hope for humanity because they don't allow the ordinary man to believe in them and call all who do crackpot conspiracy nuts wearing tinfoil hats and eating raw coffee grounds hiding out in bunkers. They don't allow people (sheeple) to believe in these things because of education (its not peer reviewed by our atheist colleagues. It's not allowed on atheist-controlled Wikipedia so it cannot be third party verified so of course it can't be true.) which is empirical by nature, although that makes me incredulous personally because of the vistas that the now-accepted realm of theoretical physics is opening the Scientific Community up to.
And there is no hope for humanity apart from Jesus Christ who came that the world might be saved, and is coming again, and will not delay his coming, which will be at the appointed time, and according to Sealed Moses, last chapter, when Jesus returns, he will find a people prepared to receive him.

I've been watching and listening to Mike Matei for hours.  I would be allowing Rick to watch COPS right now if not for the fact that my computer needs to charge.
And it needs to charge in a room Rick is not in.
         Rn Pluto TV is on the HallMark Movies and More Channel.

                   I had a lot to eat tonight, but it was mostly fruits and veggies.  I am determined, with God's help, not to mess up with lust tonight after Rick's house.

      Joy says, if Satan comes at us 100 times in a night, resist him a hundred times in a night.

Mike Matei is playing Super Contra rn.
         I am drinking chocolate milk.
   Rick gave me a book about Financial Stewardship by Andrew Wommack today.

He is a Word of Faith preacher.  I trust Word of Faith, mostly.

Jimmy Swaggart Ministries oppose the Word of Faith Movement, but they also oppose the Restoration, so, I'm not putting much stock in their opinion on Word of Faith.

      Even Michael Hur has badmouthed Trump and Kenneth Copeland (who is also Word of Faith).

O how I miss a good Hallmark Romance Movie.
   This film is pretty decent.  It's called 'All Yours!.'

Better than all the erotic romance and Raunchy teen comedy romance I'd been watching by far! (I am fully accountable for those decisions.  It was pure evilness.  It was my fault entirely.  i need to turn from those ways.)
     Satan has hit me with several temptations to impurity tonight but with God's help and for His Glory I have resisted.

  The Coming Economic Armageddon pp. xiii-xiv.

Win-win philosophy-

          One person's gain does not have to be another person's loss.

   -"All Yours"


          This is connected to something the Brilliant mathemetician said in 'A Beautiful Mind' about equilibrium in a previous journal.

                         1:45 AM Finally Mike is playing another game other than Super Contra.

        See, the Mother in 'All Yours' taught her children that they should always want to win, that they should never back down, which is why her kids always fought and argued.
      But there is a '3'rd Alternative'-- a win-win mindset, where equilibrium between two or more parties can be reached.
      Sometimes we need to win.  Sometimes there can be no compromise at all,.
   But Paul said, if at all possible, live at peace with all men.  Wise advice.  And advice directly from God, Paul being his mouthpiece, put in Paul's voiceprint, under inspiration of the Holy Spirit.

        Mike Matei is playing SNES Castlevania.

    The Mother has a boyfriend, but the male Nanny she hired to help out with her two kids, a boy and a girl, is probably the one she'll marry.  Hopefully.  That's usually the way these types of movies run.

      The Mother's name is Cassie.

           She knew him in high school (The Nanny).

   Oh, no, the bottom dropped out.  She fired him.

  I think I want to watch either Wanted Dead or Alive or The Rifleman after this.

      I have a feeling her current boyfriend is going to end up being the bad guy.  I'm calling it.

5 things I am thankful for yesterday and tonight:

*Alternatives to Temptation.

* HallMark Clean Romances

*Strawberries, mushrooms, bananas and dark chocolate.

*Reconciliation with Shane

*The Chosen and its humanizing of the Gospel Story.

5 Goals I have for this week:

*To write more of Star Wars Episode 11 Thrawn Strikes!

* To finish Ian's Season 2 DT17 Fanfics and binge some of DT17 Season 3 cartoons.

*To format more of Attack of The Clones Humorous Version Clowns Attack!

*To do my first Fate Roleplay on Roleplaying Fun discord server.

*To type more of Diary 40, and publish it in two places.

5 Desires for this week:

*To go to Pastor Pete's houseon Wednesday, get my laundry done, and watch the Mandalorian S3X2 and some of S4 of The Clone Wars.

*To watch more of The Last of Us videogame and HBO Max Show.

*For Maggie Savoie to make contact with me.

*For at least one person besides me to join my allsaints forum.

* For someone besides me to post or join (or both) on my Mara/Luke4ever forum.

Well, I did not end up finding out if her old boyfriend turned out to be the badguy, but Cassy did wind up with the male Nanny.

      Now I will watch either the Rifleman or Wanted Dead or Alive unless my computer is charged and we can watch COPS.

   Ok, I WAS going to watch Wanted: Dead Or Alive, but my computer has full charge now, so we'll be watching a little COPS now before I go at 3 AM.

      2:57 PM CDT.
I'm going home now.

                        3:22:50 AM CDT

      @ heimat. I'm still watching Mike Matei, and trying to watch a show I hate: I Love Lucy.

          Lucile Ball was commissioned by an evil spirit to play Lucy in the show, to become a bad example for mothers and housewives.

                        Her character, Lucy Ricardo, is dishonest, childish and untrustworthy in the show.

       SNES Castlevania is still on.  I haven't been paying much attention to it.

                                 6:36 AM CDT
    I forgot my meds last night.   And I never gave the cat wet catfood yet.  Well, now I will give Gandalf half a can of wet catfood.

    I Love Lucy still has not played.  The Pluto Channel has been on for hours as I typed my journal in purple.

      I'm watching a space documentary Rn.

   The curse of knowledge -- once you know something, it's hard to think of what it was like to not know it. - It can make you intolerant of others' ignorance, so stay humble, and remember that we are all still learning, and some will always know more than others, and others who you know more than may know more than you about other things.

-Maggie is living in the house in Bates City, Missouri.
-Maggie has been reading my journals and watching some of my YouTube streams..
-God did promise her to me.
-It will be this year
-I need to keep taking my meds or my Delusions will get worse.

                                                          4:58 PM CDT
                                                           I just took my pills.

                                                                                  5:38 PM
                                              I claimed every anointing I've ever had in the past, cast every demon in me out in the name of Jesus Christ, pleading the Blood over them, and told Joy of my rebaptism and reconfirmation, to be prayed about by Joseph F. Smith for his decision to grant unto me the Right hand of fellowship in the Restructured Church.

               -I need to call Pastor Pete every day at 5 PM CDT and tell him that I am done drinking Caffeine for the day and that I have taken my pills.
 

03/09--
THURSDAY

                                                3:33 AM
       I can't sleep.  I keep having dreams about nightmarish characters that seem to make sense while I'm dreaming them up, but when I wake from them I had no idea who or what they were.

                                               3:35 AM
         Last night after I went to Pastor Pete's church, Rick, Jo's sister and I went out to McDonald's.  I bought myself a Shamrock Shake and a large fry and got a water cup. Rick bought me a 4-piece Chicken McNugget when he bought Jo's sister and him sundaes. He got me the McNuggets instead of a sundae because I had already had ice cream.

                                             5:17 AM
     "Pay attention to the numbers."-God
I dreampt up that a nightmarish cat creature with glowing eyes was in place of my cat at 5:17 AM.

                                           5:19 AM
A train is going by.

Meet Josefina, pp. 69-85.

I finished Meet Josefina.

                             12:51 PM CDT

        From now on, I will not write down in my journal that I had nightmares- I don't want to give credance to the dreams satan gives me, because if I continue to do so-I was warned by Urbrother, that could end up manifesting in a spirit of anxiety, panic attacks, and physical illness.
                                           

                                         3:19 PM
         I had a Coke, and 5 Reese's cups.  After 5:00 PM today, I won't eat my sixth Reese's cup, but will save it.  It has caffeine in it.

      Well, last time I went to Rick's I didn't end up messing up that night, which was my goal.

                     I was fantasizing about Maggie and I being in a relationship for the past two hours.  I need to stop that fantasy because it is vanity.

                    I had a sausage egg and cheese croissant for lunch.

       Joy wants me to plan my meals.  And she also wants me to schedule my time.
       But every time I start such efforts I end up not following through with them, except once, which led to me bell-ringing at the Salvation Army and getting a job at McDonald's and an apartment.

       If I do start to make and follow a daily schedule and plan my meals, what could be the result?

                                 In my fantasy, I asked Maggie to write out a syllabus for me for each day, week and month based upon the things in my house.  And when my fantasy ended, I had been, in my fantasy, following said schedule.  And in my fantasy, I was committed to it.

                                                A structured day would make me less prone to temptations.

                                                    I can't rely on Maggie to one day show up and write my schedule for me.

                                                    I need to write it myself.

    But I won't put my schedule in my journal, lest it cumber my journal.

             Instead, I'll put it on the reverse side of my Scripture video content notebook (green). (This notebook is orange.).

                                              2023 AD
                      MARCH

03/09

             4:00 PM

__Eat Rice for supper.

             4:40 PM 
___Write in Diary.

5:00 PM
___Take pills and fish Oil and Vitamin C and Apple cider Vinegar tab and Coconut oil. Call Pastor Pete.  Tell him how much caffeine I had today and that I took my pills. Or text him.

5:20 PM

___Study Math

6:00 PM 

___Read Aristotle's Nichomachean Ethics

6:40 PM

__ Pray at altar. Praise God.

7:00 PM

___ Make 1 Scriptures Video.

7:45 PM

___Make 1 Wolfenstein Video.

9 PM 

___ Watch Wanted: Dead or Alive for 3 Episodes or Mando 3X2 and The Bad Batch, or just Mando.

10:30 PM

_____Teeth. Floss. Write in Diary. Put on Pajamas. Bed.


Daily Score_____

Point System: If I get everything on my list done, give myself a 10.

If more than half, but not 10, a 7.

If half, a 5.

If just a little, 3.

If nothing or next to nothing, 0 or 1.

For every 100 points, buy myself a new Journal. Then refresh to 0.

  I finished 'The Golden Armory of Cornelius Coot!', or Ian's version of the same. It was good.

  I also asked Steve if he wanted to watch 'The Mandalorian', because I had time for it in my schedule, but he said 'not now'. This was after I took his trash out.

I got an Imprimis Newsletter in the mail about the Twitter Files revealing an existential threat.  Yesterday, I got a Zion's Path Newsletter from Oak Grove Restoration Branch.

     At 5:00 PM, I need to take my pills.
I'm not going to bug Steve again about the possibility of watching 'The Mandalorian' 3X2 until at least 5:40 PM, when I should have time on my schedule.

  I told Ian I got plenty of sleep last night and about my Daily Schedule.

Mathematics: A Practical Odyssey Reviewed Chapter 1: Logic, pp. 1-5.
Aristotle's Nichomachean Ethics, pp. v-xiv.

I bought Star Wars: The Phantom Menace and Lessons in Truth by Unity Classics Library at the Bookstore.

7:36 PM I watched Mandalorian S3X2 with Steve.
Din D'jarin got rebaptized.

          9:28 PM I did everything on my list except my bedtime routine yet.

 American Girl: Meet Rebecca pp. 1-10

                             9:44 PM

                          Rick is bringing me a can of wet catfood for Gandalf (actually 2) a little later.

   Gandalf is perched on top of the left side of my loveseat.